Think thought and distraught

Oh, is she talking to me, I don't understand i cant tell if she want me to say yes or no.  I need help.  does she like me?  who knows.  Holy crap do all brains move at a hundred miles an hour.  I know that she is sending hints but when it comes down to it a hint is more like a suggestion and what if the hint is for something else.  i think that the air ventilation system is blowing warm air and its hot enough as it is.  Hot HOT  gee.  i need to understand.  is she cold.  she says she is but i don't know.  i cant help but think that she want me to put my arm around her.  is that weird am i just a hormonal enraged guy with testosterone up and out of the roof of my embarrassment.  These sentences are long i hope the grammar in this doesn't totally blow and then people will think m an idiot.  I promise i just think she's cute i never said i had compassion for her i just think that she has personality.  That guy in the corner is whipped.  why are girls so demanding.  i just want to leave society with a woman into the mountains and live in the wood with her.  why cant the world be more simple.  the devil... thats why.  The devil is a son of gun that points everywhere and shoots all and his temptations fill my mind with aroused terrible thoughts.  i hate the devil.  Why can he be a physical being that i can just shoot and forget about for ever.  because you cant forget.  remember that lie you just told.  and if you didn't then your life is a either a lie or your fricken close to perfect.  I want to do something with this weekend is that wrong.  maybe i'm just horny... probably but i don't know.  I really want to be an artist because i feel like i have some talent but in all reality being my own worst critic bite me in the butt of my life every day.  I cant believe my little brothers friend every time he comes over he demands a shake.  he asks first and its all cute but then he demand and you just want to push him into a pit of vipers and let some giant squid attack him and vomit him into the lions den.  Daniel in the lions den.  what a cool story of truth.  I need to go to work but in all honesty i hate that place the only reason i stay is for the friends and the money too but if i could have a job el swear that wasn't a piece of crap i would be all for it.  I need to look up every once in a while.  the red lines under my words are in a love hate relationship. with me.  The correct me but make me feel like my grammar is in the dump and then the world biggest ostrage with turds the sized of real big turds and it just dropped it on my canvas, paper.  i like the word canvas it makes it feel like its more that just your sketch and thought. this is a sketch of my thoughts and embrace them or not you can choose but all i know is that life judges too much and we are the worst examples.  alright well time to go and make terrible food for costumers making more than me.  oh joy